Black Guard Gets “Dirty for 30”

(Leather Life column published in Lavender Magazine, Issue #306, February 16, 2007)

PHOTOS:

The Black Guard of Minneapolis, formed in 1977 and still going strong, recently celebrated its 30th anniversary at its annual Black Frost run. The theme of the run was “Getting’ Dirty for 30.” And so they did.

One of the highlights of any Black Guard run is the show. This year’s edition was presented at The Saloon the afternoon of Saturday, Feb. 3. Directed by Ralph Schmidt, the show was by turns raunchy, naughty, patriotic and inspirational—but always entertaining.

The Saturday-evening banquet, also held at The Saloon, featured a parade of club colors at which nine clubs were represented. The meal ended with an appropriate dessert: a “Black Frost” cake with black frosting.

PHOTO: BlackFrostCake.jpg

PHOTO: Miss Allison Brooks (Carl Gscheidemeier) performed “(Your Love Is Lifting Me) Higher and Higher,” a number I remember her performing in the late 1970s at the old Sun Saloon—about the time the Black Guard was formed.

PHOTOS: Miss Caroline Knipple (Steve Burroughs) performed several numbers including “Broadway Baby.”

PHOTO: Flo, Shani von Tischler and Miss Allison Brooks perform “One Moment in Time.”

Flo performs “One Moment in Time.”

PHOTO: Shani von Tischler: “I’ll Never Love This Way Again.” (Earlier she had performed “Let’s Talk Dirty to the Animals.”)

PHOTO: Ralph Schmid performed “Ring Them Bells,” the tale of Shirley Devore, who had to travel the world to find the guy next door. The audience asked for—and got—an encore.

PHOTO: Ralph Schmidt and Tom Weiland: “Islands in the Stream.”

PHOTO: Ralph Schmidt and Carl Gscheidemeier make a lovely couple as they sing “You’re Timeless to Me.”

PHOTOS: An old joke but a good one: Ice cream lady Miss Allison Brooks has run out of chocolate ice cream. Little girl customer (Mike Delorme) keeps asking for chocolate ice cream anyway. Miss Brooks finally gets her customer to understand there’s no chocolate ice cream—with the help of a slightly obscene spelling lesson.

PHOTOS: The Black Guard’s country/western stars: Tom Weiland keeps his “heart and soul in the boondocks,” while Bruce Gohr invites us to “make a little time for the good times.”

OR

PHOTOS: The Black Guard’s country/western stars: Tom Weiland keeps his “heart and soul in the boondocks,” while Bruce Gohr invites us to “live like you were dyin’.”

PHOTO: Flo, Allison Brooks and Shani von Tischler perform the Andrews Sisters’ “Hold Tight” (“When I come home late at night, I get my favorite dish—fish!”)

PHOTO: Pat Duffy performs a ballad in homage to colorectal surgeons everywhere.